Let's start at the end, shall we? Erm.. Or the starr? Maybe the middle.

Kindergarten was supposed to be easy. He was supposed to make friends, and eat dirt, and learn how to paint, and color.. But instead he's struggling.

 Well, not academically. Social. Behaviorally. Most likely mentally. This year has been a tough tough transition for Nick. He is (eh- was) on his 3rd teacher at Atlantis Charter School.

 His year started off OK, I think with the 1st change of teachers things started to really CHANGE for him. He made it til 2 weeks til the first quarter (11/7) was over before we needed a Behavior Management Plan. I was told the plan pretty much spelled out the things they would do to 'modify' his behavior. The parts that weren't read to me, read like a Disciplinary Plan ones given at work. "Nicholas must reduce by 80%...." Eh....

 A meeting was set up for 2 weeks later on a Wednesday so my husband could join us. Coincidentally, Nicky missed MOST of that week due to the worlds worst stomach bug. And of course because I reschedule the meeting, I had to be sent a certified letter addressed the day I rescheduled the meeting, "worried" of this missed meeting and his attendance. They also said his meeting was the 17th. Clearly, that's wrong as it was a Sunday. And worried about his attendance? At that point he missed Monday, half of Tuesday and the day the letter was addressed. And of course the postcard was left in my box the following Wednesday which was the day before Thanksgiving. The letter contained paperwork asking for a consent to have him tested for an IEP.

 I dragged my feet a few days, I admit. This was my first inclination that things were more serious then a kid who couldn't sit still in class. I was then called twice a day til I made an appointment before Nick started class just to fill out the paperwork. This was at the beginning of December. Meanwhile, Nick started to behave worse. Coincidentally when the IEP testing began after Christmas. We filled out the Conners Form, met with his NEW teacher and the form made it seem like he had at the very least ADHD/Impulsivity/ODD issues. Tho, his forms showed he had his GOOD days and he had his bad days.

 Little did I know that when I took a half day at my job, that I would be blind sided with the one thing I didnt expect to hear.

 This is where my week started. Forgive me if I become emotional. This is my child. So in this room full of people, who've read me reports and were telling me about MY child, I sat alone. I wish I wasnt. I wish I at least had asked my Mom or one of my friends to sit with me. This was the toughest moment of my 29 years of existence....

 No speech problems.

 No, physical disabilities that could impair his learning (OT)

 The Teachers had nothing but good things to say about him, just that he's had some trouble lately. (They like to point out that I recently started a job and that Nicholas has a baby sister)

 The psychologist... If I could have reached across the table and given her a piece of my hand, I mean mind.... I would have.. She made it a point to point that she disliked his Flipeez hat. That she thought it was obsurd he needed a break during 3 hours of BORING testings. She explained that he did exceptionally well on the Vocab part of this testing and he only scored low on the parts he refused to do. Acedemically he is right on key. He started off the year with only knowing 2 letter sounds, now he knows 17. he can identify all Uppercase and almost all lowercase which is also progress made! Socially, not so much. She compared him to a toddler. She made me sit there for 10 mins and didnt explain to me what her recommendation at the end of her testing was. I sat there for 10 mins hearing the blood in my ears.

 The report said my son has 'severe mental disabilities'. It said that they recommended a "therapeutic environment with less students" She even tossed the word "Tourettes" out there.. (Yes, I know how obsurd that sounds. I've already heard this from friends/coworkers) Simply put, they wanted him out. They failed my son. I wanted to blame myself but I know I'm doing everything I can for him, and that included putting him in that school. I didnt fail him. They expected my answer right then and there.

They kept saying how serious this was if I waited. That all his "safety" issues were going to start counting and they could "no longer coddle him" now that the year was half over. The Dean of Students Services, did a piss poor job explaining to me what the next steps were. I was still trying to catch my breath and the waves just kept on coming. I could have them contact the Fall River Public Schools and that could take them up to 2-4 weeks to get a meeting to get him placed and if he kept getting in trouble - he could be put put in front of a judge. A JUDGE. He is 6 years old for Gods Sake. The other option was for me to unenroll him and put in in Public school and request a hearing. what do you do? What do you say? This was the end of the threats. I had had it. We broke the news to Nicholas that he was no longer a student at Atlantis Charter School and in a few days he would no longer have that consistency of his favorite teachers. I broke the news to my coworkers on Tuesday. I don't know what I would have done without their support. After a few tears, a few kind words (and a little threat of violence ;)) I had a better plan formulated. I took Wednesday off and we went in person to the School Department. They were a huge help, albeit a little stunned. They couldn't believe we had been treated that way. They quickly went to work helping us head in the right direction. I was able to get him enrolled and get his uniforms the same day. So he will start a new school, with 31 other kids in his class. ISN'T THAT AWESOME! Great consistency and matched perfectly with his recommendation from Dr Quack, er King.. Sorry, that bit of Sarcasm was brought to you by the letters H & M (as in Hurt Momma!)

 I cant say that I'm not hurt by all this, he is my son. I love him and I know him better than anyone. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs "THAT'S NOT MY BOY" they are talking about. But I didn't. I let them act like he is some menace. And I know, I know he has something that is wrong with him - i'm not disputing that. But he needs HELP and I'm not sure who or what at this point can give that to him.

 We will know more in a few weeks when he has his Placement meeting.

 Tomorrow he has first day at a public school. I'm worried. I'm worried he will be terrible distraction or he will get picked on. That he just as bad as he was at Atlantis or WORSE. How does a teacher teach 31 other kids?

 I pray that the next two quarters is easier. But I know it wont be. I know my fight has only just begun.

Taking a break? Lets start a blog she said!

I started this blog 3 years ago because I wanted to document my hopefully impending pregnancy. (That we hadnt told people we were planning) I ended up going back to work and life got so busy that when I (eventually 18 months later) got pregnant I forgot about the blog. Lifes a bit crazy right now. We welcomed a little girl Emily into our lives in November of 2012. So now I am a Mom of 2 November babies! After all the tears, and worries of if and when shes beyond worth it. I went back to work after a 6 month hiatus in October of 2010 to working at the same company I had before Nicholas' birth. I eventually moved up from photographer and became a manager. In April of this year the company I worked for closed its doors. I've been a SAHM for the last almost 5 months. Nicholas and Emily have enjoyed time with Mommy (Nicky joined TBall in the spring and it was fun for everyone!) My original November baby will be starting Kindergarten in just 12 short days! And Nelson and I will be celebrating 6 years together on August 31st. This blog (if I can keep up with it!) will hopefully be filled with the good and the bad of this crazy life.